beauty – Lessons I learned after I turned 30

The Guilty Feminist

Also, wondering if you’d like to go to this with me…https://www.facebook.com/events/1643765342395990/ I listen to the podcast and it’s really good and I thought it might be up your street. Lucy messaged.

I had a quick look and I was intrigued. I didn’t look it up beforehand. I wanted to see whether I’d enjoy it without knowing much about it.

A couple of months later, 22nd of May, 2019

After delicious dinner at Soleto’s, which was mainly occupied (except our friend Dan and the chef) by women who were about to watch the show, we headed to the theatre, again mainly women. It felt surprisingly, unexpectedly empowering to be amongst so many women.

Three hours later, we left the theatre with a smile on our face, happy, re-enacting some of the funny moments whilst pondering on what true feminism is and how still to the day there’s so much discrimination, even in small, little things we barely notice.

Deborah Frances-White, comedian and hostess of the show and her guests for the evening Bridget Christie, Desiree Burch, Sophie Duker and Grace Petrie were amazing. I couldn’t stop laughing with Bridget, Desiree and Sophie’s comedy on dating in your 40s, bi-sexuality, racism and many other hot topics that women get grief on.

I loved Grace Petrie’s political folk songs and what an excellent idea of Deborah’s to introduce two local charities who spoke to us about the incredible work they do, Yellowdoor supporting and preventing domestic and sexual abuse and Chrysalis supporting transgender people and their significant others.

I’m now already a big fan of Deborah. Funny, witty, intelligent, charismatic (someone I met recently called me charismatic and I burst out laughing, I never thought of myself as charismatic). The following day I watched her Tedx talk from a few years ago and that blew my mind.

I already started listening to her podcast (you can listen here or look up Guilty Feminist on Spotify, it’s Deborah with guests discussing feminism in the modern world and of course it’s thought-provoking, inspiring and hilarious) and bought her book.

If only there were more women like Deborah. No wait, there are. Everywhere. You and me and many others say no to what (mainly male dominated) society dictates every day by not getting married or having children just for the sake of it, we refuse to get into an unhappy, unfulfilling relationship because if you are single it means ‘something is wrong with you’, we follow our dreams even if that means being the only female colleague in that engineering company, we do what we think is right for us, we have sex for fun and not just to please someone else, we don’t need make up and toned bodies to make us feel good about ourselves but we wear or not wear make up and exercise or not for ourselves.

Feminism is not about not shaving (unless that’s what you genuinely like) or being a lesbian or not letting a man help you put together a coffee table or feeling guilty you love face creams and rom-coms. It’s about all of the things I mentioned above, not conforming to man-made society norms, be whoever you want to be without stupid gender restrictions and many more, like not letting an unwanted dick pic or a wolf whistle or groping become socially acceptable.

Start your own business, do what you love for a living without feeling guilty for not just being a parent or wife or partner or daughter or sister . You can be all of these but above all you need to be yourself, love yourself, look after you.

A Facebook friend, ex- colleague who I rarely chat with (we all have a few of those on our friends list) recently messaged me to say that he loves my feminist social media. I thanked him, though I never considered my opinions as feminist, until I went to Deborah’s show. Then I understood what he meant.

So here’s to all inspiring women, our mums, sisters, friends, strangers who we admire, ourselves and those in the limelight, all of the feminist advocates.

Thank you Lucy for introducing me to this great community. I’ll miss you!

Eleni

Blogmas day 12- Pampering

Sometimes you just need a break to breathe and look after yourself.

After a hectic couple of weeks last night I had a whole night to myself. Not quite sure how that happened, but I’m so happy it did.

I had a healthy vegetable and tuna dinner and a long, hot shower before I settled in the living room.

I watched back to back Friends episodes whilst I treated myself to a Boots Rooibos beauty mask (which made me look ridiculous but my skin felt great after that), painted my nails and I spent an unhealthy amount of time staring at my beautiful Christmas tree. Still can’t believe how great it looks.

A quiet, relaxing evening. Ahhh, just perfect.

Eleni

From a hardworking teenager to a chef to an artist- The story of Andy Jones, a Solent Fine Art Student

I love meeting inspiring humans who love what they do. They talk about it with so much passion and eloquence. I instantly know when that happens. I can see the sparkle in their eyes. And I smile without realising.

What is even rarer is to meet well-rounded people who can talk not only about what they love, but everything and anything else. And Andy is one of them.

A couple of months I received a message on Twitter. Andy, a final year Fine Art Student at Solent came across my blog and wanted to meet and have a chat. He offered to show me around the Fine Art studios and his third year project he was working on.

I love meeting new people-oh if I could do that for a living- and any excuse to visit the beautiful, colourful, creative Below Bar Studios again, I didn’t have to think twice.

We met on a grey Thursday afternoon a couple of weeks ago. And I enjoyed every minute. Andy is honest and open about his life. I miss it, I often find that people here are too polite and don’t say what they think, afraid they may reveal too much. But not Andy.

We sit opposite his impressive piece of work.

We talked about his life, what a life he had. He left Liverpool when he was 17 to get away from family troubles and had to work since. He became a chef, at some point working at the Marco Pierre White restaurant in London, living THE life.

We inevitably end up talking about food, Mediterranean cuisine, he lived in Spain for a while so he really knows the essence of delicious food.

He somehow lost everything later on, and some years and six children later, one day his wife said to him ‘I’ll go back to work, and it’s time for you to chase your dream’.

That’s when he applied to study Fine Art at Solent. He wanted to become an artist since he was a child, but as you’d imagine, there wasn’t much support for a young Liverpudlian lad in the ’80s to become an artist, you ‘can’t make a living out of it’.

We talk about the course. He loves it. He absolutely loves it but he feels there is not much support, recognition or promotion from the University. As a mature student, commuting for hours most days, he expected more for himself and his classmates.

We go through his work and his current project. Imposing, sad but incredibly powerful.

The big hammer, the ‘corporate’, the ‘big powers’ ruining our planet, ruining humanity. All of that painted on plastic canvases. The contrast, the intentional irony.

On one of his paintings, he added a crown on his hammer hitting the Grenfell tower, on which he added a little head. A prime, tragic example of how greediness has destroyed the lives of innocent, every day people. I can see it so very clearly (image below it’s not the one I’ve seen, but it depicts the same scene).

On the top right, I catch a familiar image with the corner of my eye. The traditional blue and white houses you often see on Greek Islands. I smile. It reminds me of the cute little holiday apartment I stayed with my sisters in Protaras, two years ago, the best summer I had in a long time.

He shows me around the studio, it somehow seems bigger than the last time I was there. He talks me through the rest of the students work, some finished, some still in progress. That’s why I love art. I love the creativity, the beauty of the surrealism mixed with cruel reality in more than one occasions and the subjectivity. You may not see what I see, and I may not see what you see. That’s the beauty of it.

I leave the Studio grateful I met Andy and I spent my lunchtime at a gorgeous, creative space, escaping reality even for a little bit.

I can’t wait for their degree show, 26° Below Bar, opening night on the 8th of June. Everyone is welcome. If you want to see Andy’s and the rest of our amazing Fine Art students’ work, come along. I’ll be there.

Eleni

A magical home spa evening, courtesy of Sabão

Yesterday was a long but exciting day. It was my first day working with a new team in Academic Services (exciting projects coming up!) and when I got home I was exhausted.

I thought that was the perfect opportunity to finally try the handmade bath treats sent to me to test and review by a new local business, Sabão. Nisha, the lovely owner sent me a pretty, colourful little package with a couple of bath bomb and body butter samples I received at the weekend. As soon as I opened the box I fell in love. The scents were just magical.

So after my day 10 yoga session and quick dinner I lit some candles, I’ve put a relaxing Spa Music playlist on Spotify and I got in my filled with hot water and smelling like I’d imagine heaven would smell like bathtub.

As you may know, I’m obsessed with smells so I chose to go for the one I liked the smell the most first. It was a tough choice but I went for the West Indian Amyris & Egyptian Geranium one. That’s exactly how I’d thought Ancient, Exotic Asian baths would have smelled.

Honest to God, I do not remember the last time I felt so relaxed. The scents, the music, the tranquil sound of the water, the candles and their reflection… I’ve created my own, personal home spa and it was pretty special.

I’ve never tried a bath bomb before, I tend to go for bubble bath foams or soaks mixed with sea salts so I didn’t know what to expect. But I absolutely loved it.

As soon I got out of the bath my skin smelled incredible and felt as soft as silk (unlike other bath products that sometimes leave my skin dry, Nisha uses essential oils in her bath bombs, which makes a huge difference.)

I tried some of the organic raw shea butter afterwards purely because I wanted to see how it smelled on my skin and I can’t even put in words how amazing it did smell.

I honestly think everything I tried was worth more than their actual price.

As you know I’m not a professional blogger and I don’t get paid to write this, so this is my personal opinion.

For someone who is enchanted by smells, like myself, my home spa evening was an incredible experience.

If you want to find out more on Nisha’s story and support a local business whilst treating yourself to luxurious bath bombs and other handmade, organic skincare goodies all details are on their website.

Thank you lovely lady again for the amazing treats you sent me. I absolutely loved it. I can’t wait to try the rest.

Namaste

Eleni