Why don’t we talk about mental health in Cyprus?

It often comes to my mind, that, when I was in high school, I’d regularly get upset about the fact I couldn’t accurately, and in the way I truly wished, articulate my thoughts and opinions when writing essays. There was always a barrier. There was always something missing.

Years later, when I started putting my thoughts on paper (and later on a blog) it somehow became easier, as if I was released from whatever kept my expressive side blocked and silenced. And I feel that’s how talking about mental health evolved over the years not just for me, but for the rest of the world too.

Although I studied psychology for my first degree, even then, about 18 years ago (I’m almost 36, to save you from the trouble of calculating my age), there was a stigma about it. Not many (if any) would openly admit they suffered from depression, or anxiety, or autism, or bipolar disorder, or panic attacks, as it was considered a weakness or pure ‘insanity’. You would only see a psychologist if you were ‘crazy’.

After living in the UK for 10 years, having volunteered for a mental charity, having written about depression and anxiety myself, seeing, listening and reading about people openly sharing their feelings and troubles, witnessing mental health organisations growing in numbers and popularity (NGOs such as the Samaritans or Mind or social enterprises like the brilliant Touch I used to volunteer for) I was under the impression things would have progressed in Cyprus too, not to the degree they did in the UK, but certainly to some extent.

Surely by now people would have realised that is as important (if not more) to look after their mental health the way they look after their physical health. If you break your leg, you’d go to the doctor, if you are paralysed from anxiety, you’d go to a psychologist, right? Not to mention the effects of the digital era, as well as the global pandemic on mental health, and the fact that we are all busy, all the time. One day we’ll reach to a point we’ll have no time to breathe (just writing about it stresses me out) .

A few days ago, whilst enjoying a coffee on my own at a local cafe, I was brainstorming ideas on what organisation I can volunteer for, and I was unpleasantly surprised to discover after looking up mental health NGOs to volunteer that there aren’t really any on the island!

Why is that? Is it because there’s still stigma around mental health here? Are people here still in denial about the importance of looking after your mental wellbeing? Are they scared to admit when they are struggling? Do they still perceive sharing your feelings as a weakness (it’s one of the hardest things to do actually and it shows strength and character, a brilliant example of the power of vulnerability as Bene Brown eloquently talked about it a few years ago https://youtu.be/iCvmsMzlF7o) ? Is it because there isn’t enough interest by locals or psychologists?

I have been talking about it with a few friends and colleagues lately and I’m still baffled why that is and I wish I had the means to set up a mental health NGO myself, just to make a start.

For now I can’t, but what I can do is continue to talk about mental health with friends, family and strangers, because every time I do, someone would relate to and share their own experiences (which I love to hear about, everyday human stories are so powerful in so many ways) and that’s a clear sign that any outlets to talk about mental health struggles with others in a safe, non-judgmental environment, where you can also receive relevant advice and/or training on how to identify signs or symptoms of a person suffering would be of great benefit.

Who knows, maybe we can soon start a movement and change things up on the island, at least when it comes to mental health!

Namaste

Eleni

Advertisement

Kopiaste at Fikardou!

As promised, I’m reposting some of my travel blogs and vlogs from my second creation Kopiaste just to cheer myself and others up, better days are coming soon!

Kopiaste

Just a 40 minute drive from down town (Nicosia), one comes across one of the most infamous, beautiful, picturesque villages of Cyprus, Fikardou.

Cobbled streets, traditional houses and gorgeous mountain views.

I recently visited after many years and it didn’t disappoint. This time I opted for a guided tour of the two most known traditional houses in the heart of the village which have been turned into a museum.

I learned a lot about the village as well as Cypriot tradition and had a great time with my sisters. Our little trip ended with delicious traditional lunch at Yiannakos tavern, the only tavern in the village (thank God the food was great!).

Here’s the video I put together, hope you enjoy it. If you do, like, share and follow for hopefully many more of this!

Namaste

Eleni

View original post

My bilingual-expat split personality

I’ve been back to Cyprus for two weeks now and I’m still ‘adjusting’. It’s never been that bad before, maybe because I always had an end date in mind or I had somewhere and something to return to, regardless how gravely I disliked it, or maybe so much happened in the last month alone, my brain is still struggling to fully comprehend what is going on.

But it can’t explain my annoying, pretty much constant (with very brief moments of happiness, laughter and relaxation) irritableness, and no, it’s not hormones.

I’m like an upset, angry hedgehog, keeping my quills raised, prickling everyone in my way, blindly and indiscriminately.

Why do I feel like this? Why does every single thing upset me? Have I been away for too long? How long can I stick it out for? Should I just find a job in another country and leave ASAP?

Endless questions with no answers. Suddenly, out of nowhere Gaia Vince turned a shining light in this question mark shaped pitch black room.

This idea that you gain a new personality with every language you speak, that you act differently when speaking different languages, is a profound one.” she writes in a brilliant article discussing the benefits of being bilingual. Ironically from the whole article I focused on one of the disadvantages of being fluent in two languages.

http://www.bbc.com/future/story/20160811-the-amazing-benefits-of-being-bilingual

Am I really bilingual since I was born, raised and lived in Cyprus until I was 22 you might wonder. The answer is without a second thought yes. After 10 years of fully immersing in the British culture and way of life, I think and speak in English first.

Apparently bilinguals develop two different mindsets, they are a different person depending on the language they speak at the time (when you add the country they live in AND the language they speak at a given time in the mix that’s when it gets mind-baffling) and those mindsets are always in conflict as the brain is constantly trying to decide which language to use.

My two selves are always in conflict now that I’m back in Cyprus and not just the language parts. The noise, the attitudes, the people, the culture, everything I’d normally enjoy when I’m visiting Cyprus contradict my ‘British self’ who is dominating at the moment and can’t compromise and accept the fact now we are in Cyprus for (hopefully only) a few months it needs to let my other self out more or learn how to live here. My ‘Cypriot self’ is weak though and doesn’t even have an idea on what makes it Cypriot anymore, it hasn’t lived here for 10 years and since it last lived here it was a whole other person, an immature, 22 year old Cypriot who knew nothing about life or herself. That person doesn’t exist anymore but for most of my friends and family that’s the person they knew and sometimes treat me as if I’m that person, which doesn’t help with the eternal battle in my head.

So, I finally have the answer, but what’s the solution?

No idea. Though my ‘British self’ desperately desires to flee, I’m giving it time for now.

If you’ve been in a similar situation and/or wish to share some words of wisdom, please do. In the meantime, I’ll get back into my yoga and try to bring some calmness and tranquillity in this stormy, windy sea of my mind.

Eleni

Mini break at Protaras

Good morning, I had an idea! The little sister messaged, a week before I was to finish my CELTA course.

Do you want to book a holiday apartment in Protaras for two days for the two of us to go the first week you are back? Sun, sea, swimming, food, relaxation?

YES, of course. I’ve been desperate for a holiday, I hadn’t had one since Christmas, I was overly stressed planning my last teaching session at the time and I was so tired I was still in bed on Sunday noon, this was just what I needed.

There was sun, sea, swimming and all the things she promised plus (unnecessary) drama and laughter. I vlogged the whole thing, perfect opportunity to start filming again. I’m a but rusty and because there was a lot going on in my mind, I spoke SUPER fast at times, but I hope you like it.

All the places we’ve been:

-Mimosa beach. A little bay hidden behind a hotel (where you can get drinks and food). Quiet and serene most of the time, perfect for a relaxing day in the sun and a swim in the clear blue waters and there is a diving instructor nearby if you are into it.

Light and Blue Marelia apartments. Bright, airy and inspired by Greek island architecture, set on the top of a hill facing Profits Elias church (gorgeous views from their terrace), reasonably priced, we loved these apartments three years ago when we first stayed and they did not disappoint this time either.

-Profitis Elias church. A beautiful little chapel on the top of the hill overseeing Protaras, offering incredible views of the city and the sea. We went at night and the steps were well lit, the ascent only took 5 minutes. It’s definitely worth visiting if you are in the area.

-Pahit Ice. One of the island’s local chains offering scrummy ice cream. I recommend their pistachio ice-cream and their frozen fruit yogurt.

Konnos Bay beach. A gorgeous bay situated between Ayia Napa and Protaras, one of Ayia Napa’s 14 Blue Flag beaches. Clear, perfect temperature water, waterports facilities and a great cafe overlooking the beach. Just stunning.

Souvlaki tou Soukri tavern. A quirky Greek tavern in central Paralimni (a 10 minute drive from Protaras) where all food is served on wax paper. Everything we tried was delicious, especially their fried courgette balls and chicken souvlaki. Excellent customer service, generous portions and great prices (we paid 19 euros for three souvlaki skewers, a sausage, a meatball/’soutzouki’, 4 courgette balls, salad, tzatziki, fries and water) though have cash with you as they don’t accept card. Oh there is an ATM and parking space at the central square, a two minute walk from the restaurant.

Andama tavern. A huge tavern in the middle of Protaras tourist area. One of the few in the centre that offers great, authentic Greek food. We tried their ‘Piatakia'(little plates), their version of tapas (smaller than meze) and everything tasted amazing, especially their Garida saganaki (prawns in tomato and feta sauce) and Politiko Kebab. A bit more expensive than we expected (we paid 40 euros for Politiko Kebab, fried calamari, prawns saganaki, salad, falafel and water) but great service and plenty of food for two, it was worth every penny.

I hope you enjoyed my video, I’ll try and make more over the next few months, depending where life takes me. Next one will be of Rhodes, since I’ll be exploring the island for a few days starting tomorrow.

Eleni

Following my dreams (just need to find out what they are) Chapter 2: Cyprus

Tuesday, 27th of August,

Wow. I do NOT know where to start from. If you could only see what is happening inside my head.

OK let’s start from right now.

I’ve been in Cyprus for two days and I spent the first one at the beach, at a gorgeous little bay in Protaras, Sirena Bay (with a cute, bohemian restaurant at the top of a hill overlooking the sea) which felt like manna from heaven, like rain after a hot, humid day, like a hot cup of tea and chocolate digestives on a freezing cold, winter afternoon.

As you know, I spent August in Cambridge doing my CELTA course. One of the most challenging, intense, stressful but also rewarding, extraordinary experiences of my life so far.

I haven’t slept more than a few hours a night for a month, I cried many a times, my anxiety completely paralysed me more than once, I didn’t get to see Cambridge much, visit Grantchester or the Wren library or go punting (I’m definitely returning in Cambridge just to do all this) but it was all worth it, not only for getting the qualification and marked as ‘above standard’ (Who? Me! I never taught in my life!) but mostly for the friends I made from all over the world. My classmates, my students, my flatmates. I’ll write about it very soon to share my experience with others who are considering doing the CELTA. For now, I’m still trying to recover from it. I still dream of lesson plans, teaching, my classmates, my tutors.

On my last day in the UK, I visited my brother Andi and had an awesome day in London. It didn’t feel real what was happening. I have actually left Southampton for good, I finished my course and I’m on my way to Cyprus, with no fixed plan. What the hell.

I’m in Cyprus since Sunday and I feel completely lost. Should I try and get an English language teaching job and get experience right away, since I absolutely loved teaching, but leave in a month, or should I do what I originally planned, and have a few months of holiday, write, make videos, read books, try different things and then go? Should I go in Vietnam first or Costa Rica? Asia or Latin America? Or Europe?

No bloody idea. For now, I’ll leave all of this behind and enjoy a couple of weeks of holiday, a few days in Protaras and then Rhodes (vlogs coming very soon), get back into my yoga, give my mind time to rest and reset and then who knows.

To all my friends, in Southampton, Cambridge, Russia, Bangladesh, Spain, Italy and wherever else you might be, I miss you dearly already.

I sometimes wish making a decision was easy, so many options but then again how boring life would be if I didn’t have any.

Eleni

Easter…the Cypriot way

Χριστός Ανέστη (Christos Anesti/Christ is risen) to all.

I’ve haven’t celebrated Easter back home for a long time and every year around this time nostalgia kicks in and I miss all the weird and wonderful traditions only happening in Cyprus (and some also in Greece).

Preparations for Easter start 10 weeks in advance. This is what I remember:

The first week is a normal one (fasting on Wednesdays and Fridays, which are days of fasting all year around- you are not allowed to eat meat or dairy or anything with oil).

The second week, everything is allowed, (Apokreo week) even on Wednesdays and Fridays. On Thursday (“Tsiknopempti”) of that week a LOT of meat and other traditional dishes are consumed and most people celebrate the evening with friends and family. In Cyprus we make delicious, fluffy, sweet pourekia (fried dumplings) with anari (Cypriot cheese similar to ricotta), a local delicacy we make on different occasions, one of them is Tsiknopempti.

download (2)
Pourekia with anari

Also on this Sunday, the Cypriot Carnival takes place, with most of the celebrations in Limassol. A lot of dressing up parties going on during the week until the big parade on Sunday.

The following week no meat is allowed, but you can eat dairy products (Tirinis week).

The week after that the 40 days of strict fasting (no meat, dairies, chocolate, not even olive oil!) start from Green Monday.

Green Monday is a public holiday in Cyprus and Greece and most people spend it having a picnic in green fields and fly kites. The pic-nic usually consists of dips like hummus and taramas, olives, beetroot, halva, lots of different vegetables and fresh bread.

6b3e86d1eede1369bdff3ec8c2f7554e_L

Every Sunday for the following weeks celebrates a different religious event that leads up to Easter and Fridays are dedicated to Holy Mary (beautiful melodies on those Friday services are sang, called ‘Salutations to Mother Mary’).

Here is a sample sang by nuns.

Then we come to the Holy Week.  

The Saturday just before is dedicated to Lazarus resurrection and the dead, so we all remember our special ones on that day and light a candle in their memory.

Sunday marks Jesus arrival in Jerusalem where Jews welcomed him laying palm leaves on the street and chanting.

Holy Monday is dedicated to Jesus cursing a fig tree and also to Joseph, son of Jacob (of the Old Testiment).

Holy Tuesday is dedicated to the 10 Virgins parable.

Holy Wednesday is dedicated to a sinned woman who washed Jesus’s feet with her tears and the hymn of St Kassiani is sang.

Holy Thursday is dedicated to Last Supper, Jesus prayer at Gethsemane, his betrayal by Judas, his arrest and trial. On that night a re-enactment of the Crucifixion is performed in church (no humans involved). It’s also tradition to dye eggs red, which we use for ‘Egg battle’ on Easter Sunday.

In Cyprus, on Thursdays, most of families bake one of my favourite traditional Easter pastries, flaounes. My dad makes the best!

Holy Friday is dedicated to Jesus death, during which a wooden Epitaph symbolising Jesus tomb is carried around the church and later in the neigbourhood followed by everyone (priests, chanters etc) and the most beautiful eulogies are sang. Some churches have choirs performed them (I used to be in one when I was a child). Whilst eulogies are sang little girls dressed in white throw flowers around the ‘tomb’.

In the evening all saints icons are covered with black sheet as a sign of mourning.

On Saturday morning the news that Jesus resurrected break out and this happens at church: (Maybe not as enthusiastically as this priest).

In the evening, around 11pm, we all gather at church to ‘officially’ celebrate Jesus resurrection.

Lights go off at 12am, and a hymn called Χριστός Ανέστη (Jesus resurrected) is chanted multiple times. We all light a candle and wish each other Χριστός Ανέστη! The service finishes at 3am usually, but most leave just after 12am. It’s a tradition to eat Magiritsa (a traditional soup made for Easter) or avgolemoni (soup made with rice, eggs and lemon juice) on that night.

This is from last night’s service (thank you Anna for the wonderful photo).

Also on Saturday evening, it’s a Cypriot tradition to light a fire that represents burning Judas, as he betrayed Jesus.

download (4)

On Sunday noon, the Vespers of Love are on at church for about half an hour.

After that, families and friends are gathered for a LARGE meal, traditional games are played (egg and spoon and sack races amongst others) and we all clink our red eggs with each other, the one whose egg doesn’t break is the winner.

And that’s how we celebrate Easter.

Happy Easter!!! Christos Anesti! Χριστός Ανέστη, χρόνια πολλά!

PS. I do not own any images used, most I found online.. Thank you to my little sis for the cover photo and the church snap) x

Eleni

A taste of Greece at Giagia Victoria cafe.

Right next to the Ledras barricade and crossing point to the ‘Turkish side of the city’, there’s a little cafe bringing some of the most traditional flavours of Greece to Cyprus, Giagia (Grandma) Victoria.

Its beautiful yard is literally right next to the barrels and barbed wire. Fascinating and deeply sad if you are Cypriot or know about Cypriot history.

We made it there on a sunny New Year’s eve, the city centre bursting with music, traditional New Year carols (καλαντα Πρωτοχρονιας) and delicious smells as people in the shops took out their foukou (BBQ), put the meat on the large skewers and waited for their souvla (large pieces of meat cooked on a long skewer over a charcoal barbecue, a Cypriot, largest version of souvlaki), Cyprus national dish, to be grilled. God we love our food in Cyprus and any occasion to make souvla, we take.

The cafe itself looks amazing, with vintage decor, as if it came out of a 50’s Greek movie. It’s known for serving traditional ‘Politika’ (Constantinople) and other treats. There’s something so nostalgic about it I can’t explain.

The food on offer: delicious.

Freshly made bougatsa (Greek breakfast/snack pastry) and pita (pastries not pita bread) with savoury (spinach, cheese, chicken) and sweet fillings (the traditional and infamous sweet and full of cream), other Greek traditional pastries such as tsoureki (sweet bread) and kourou (mini pies) and desserts, many, many desserts from simple cakes to complex chocolate puddings.

We went for spanakopita (spinach filled pastry), kotopita (chicken), tiropita (cheese) and the traditional mpougatsa me krema (sweet cream).

The coffee (Ι went for a Cypriot traditional one and co-incidentally they served the brand my dad has worked for over 30 years, Kafes tou Laikou) is served in the traditional briki (coffee pot) enhancing the already authentic experience.

The service is quick and friendly and the prices, very reasonable for what’s on offer.

Just before we left we got some puddings to have at home. Dessert heaven.

No wonder Paul Hollywood visited a while ago and the owner showed him how he made his delicious treats. How on earth he flips that fylo without breaking? Magic!

If I lived back home, I’d be there every day.

Eleni

PS Thank you to my little sister Anna for some of the wonderful pictures.

Oi kallikantzaroi (the Goblins)

Every year on this day, a vague, blurry memory of old Epiphany day celebrations in Cyprus pops in my mind. It’s a bright, sunny winter morning in Nicosia. I’m about 10 years old, I’m wearing a pretty dress and my little sister, a few years younger and I are going around to everyone at my grandpa’s house where the family was gathered saying Καλημερα τζιε τα Φώτα τζιε την πουλουστρινα πρωτα. ( It’s difficult to translate and won’t make much sense but Good morning, the Epiphany and a gift first).

They would all give us some money as a gift and we’d eat homemade loukoumades (Greek honey soaked dough balls) and then throw some on the roof to keep Kallikantzarous away. I’ve always found the Kallikantzarous folklore fascinating.

(Thank you to my sisters for this, the middle one for getting loukoumades for the family and the youngest for the pictures. I can’t taste them unfortunately but I could imagine how delicious they are).

Kallikantzaroi (goblins) live underground, sawing the world tree so it will fall and destroy the Earth, but when they are about to do so, it’s Christmas day which means they can come to the surface and cause trouble to humans.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kallikantzaros#/media/File:Kallikatzaroi.jpg

On the Epiphany (6 January), the sun starts moving again, and they have to go back and continue sawing. Whilst they were away the world tree has healed itself, because of the magic of Christmas, so they must start working all over again. This happens every year.

In Cyprus we throw loukoumades on the roof tops to keep them away from us on their last day and we sing the infamous Τιτσί τιτσι λουκάνικο, κομμάτι ξεροτήανο, να φάτε τζαι να φύετε. Also it is believed that they are scared of Holy Water and that’s why priests go to each house in the neighbourhood sprinkling Holy water from the Epiphany morning service.

And this is the story of Kallikantzaroi.

Eleni

Cypriot family brunch in Larnaca

I have a list. A wish list. A wish list of cafes and restaurants I’ve heard about or discovered through Instagram I want to visit.

Today I made it to one of them. Lazaris, a bakery bar in the centre of Larnaca, serving traditional Cypriot delicacies with a modern twist, I couldn’t wait to try their food ever since I discovered them by chance on Instagram.

I finally felt better and it happened that the whole family could make it, a rare occasion and I’m glad we did.

In the heart of Larnaca, right next to Agios Lazaros Church, Cypriot vintage decor, I particularly loved the beams, it was buzzing with people (we were lucky to get a table) and felt warm and cosy.

Most of the family went for Cypriot breakfast (lountza, halloumi, fried eggs, Cypriot fresh bread, olives and a side beetroot salad) and I went for one of their sandwiches, with avocado, edam cheese, halloumi (can’t go wrong with double cheese), chicken, egg and tomato in traditional Cypriot bread. Everything was well seasoned and flavoursome. My green tea with dried fruit was also superb.

I was too full to have something else after that but the rest of the family tried a few of their puddings.

After a while a couple of friends I haven’t seen for a long time joined us and we all had a chat and a laugh.

Great food, friends, family, laughter, a wonderful afternoon!

I definitely recommend it. The place. And the combo of food, loved ones and laughter.

Eleni

Blogmas Day 24- Last Minute Christmas Shopping

Happy Christmas Eve!

I’m still suffering but I’m so happy I spent the day with my sisters, doing some last minute Christmas shopping.

I love that my sisters are my best friends and how we laugh with the silliest things.

That’s happiness for me. Special little moments with loved ones. Just by being with each other.

Now time to attempt for the six of us (parents, sisters and Oscar the great) to watch a film together, it rarely goes smoothly.

Last Blogmas tomorrow. I can’t believe I made it!

Eleni