communicare – Lessons I learned after I turned 30

A day of Communicare, Art and Crafts

Saturday morning

My alarm went off at 8am but I could barely move. I’ve only been back from my holiday for a day and went straight to work, on a Friday. After a week of wandering and exploring the Forest, London and Brussels (I will be attempting to put together vlogs to accompany my blogs, coming soon hopefully, if I manage to learn the basics of video editing, wish me luck!), I was in high spirits but oh my I was tired.

I was so close to not doing anything at all and have a rest day but my heart wouldn’t let me. I haven’t seen Kathy for a while and I promised to take her out for tea and cake next time I visit. She loves going out and about but after a recent fall she is not very mobile. If I were to hold her arm though and with the aid of her walking stick we could make it.

The Communicare Vintage and Craft fair was also on today, in Portswood. I thought maybe I’d skip that and go straight to Kathy’s but I haven’t seen the lovely Communicare people since I signed up to befriending and Bryony and I went to meet Kathy for the first time.

To make things worse, after a week of holiday and a week before payday I was pretty broke.

After arguing with my self, twirling and whirling in bed for a good half an hour I came up with a plan, sort of. I’d get up and get ready quickly, Uber it to the Fair and walk back home to save money. I could then head to Kathy’s. There were a lot of events in town on the day but I was too tired to attempt more.

I made it to the Fair when it had just started, at 11am. I was stationed at the entrance to welcome people in and ask them to guess the adorable Communibear’s favourite food to initiate conversation and it was fun as well.

I had the most fun and also bizarre couple of hours.

I got to talk to a lot of people and I’ve bumped into colleagues and lovely ladies from SingNow Choir I hadn’t seen for a while.

I watched Annie, Communicare’s manager interviewed by That’s TV Solent, a local TV channel and had a chat with the cameraman and interviewer about video editing.

A random man (who smelled of alcohol) thought I was Polish and came straight to me and asked for toilet paper. I don’t speak Polish but I managed to figure that out. Just before he left he asked for a selfie (!). That never happened to me before and I didn’t know what to do but agreed. I wondered whether that’s how famous people feel when strangers ask them for photos.

I had a slice of coffee and walnut cake and a quick wander in before I left. So many beautiful stalls including Sue’s wonderful flower arrangements.

It wasn’t too busy inside unfortunately as there were 4-5 major events running on the same day in the city, as I mentioned before but it looked great.

On my way back I decided to pop at the Spark and check out the Accessible Art Show. Amazing. Blog coming soon but here’s a flavour.

I then passed by Guildhall Square to listen to the live music (So: Music City Festival was on) but there were in between acts and setting up for the next performance. The Square wasn’t busy either.

After about an hour I made it to Kathy’s. I was a bit anxious whether she’d be OK getting out of the flat but as soon as I walked in her coat was by her side (though she didn’t know I was going today) and when I asked her if she felt well enough to go out she was so happy, her face lit I couldn’t possibly not at least try. Though her memory is not doing well she remembers the Shopping Mall and every time I ask her where she’d like to go, she mentions it first (she would love a cruise too, and a trip to Italy, her travelling spirit never goes away).

I helped her get her shoes on and slowly started moving. There are a few steps within the flat who she struggled with and she needed a minute or two to rest before we headed out. We stopped a couple of times for her to catch her breath but she loved it.

I got her some tea and cake and had a wander around West Quay. She finished all her cake and tea (It’s the first time I’ve seen someone enjoy their cake so much, taking her time to eat every single piece, mindfulness at its best, though I’m sure she never heard the term before but she definitely mastered it) watched people come and go, she had a chat with a random lady who sat next to her at a bench and smiled at everyone. I’ve never seen her so happy.

On our little walk we came across the ShopCreative fair but my attention was on Kathy I didn’t spend much time looking. It looked lovely though. It’s on all weekend if you fancy. The lovely Sarah is there with her gorgeous ceramic and glass creations.

I was worried on our way back as she got extremely tired and I held her whilst she leaned on a phone box to rest. But all good. We made it back home safe and she couldn’t wait until we go out again.

I hope she gets a wheelchair so I can take her further out. I wish I still had my car.

I came home feeling exhausted but happy. What a wonderful day it’s been. I treated myself to pizza and Netflix (the Maddeleine McCann Documentary is fascinating).

Now time to tackle my long to-do-list.

Happy Sunday!

Eleni

Chat with a 91 year old

‘My dad used to say ‘always keep moving’, that’s the secret of still feeling young when you grow old’ Kathy told me after I complimented her for looking way younger than 91. That’s something I’ll always remember.

Saturday morning

I got up early, had breakfast, got ready quickly and I was out of the house in half an hour. I put my headphones on but I was distracted with the sea of people in town, so I took them off. One of the cruise ships must have stopped at the port, as I picked out strong American accents from a large group wearing cowboy hats and further down another gang dressed up fancy.

Back to my mission. I was on my way to visit my new, 91 year old friend Kathy. I met Kathy a week ago, on Valentine’s day actually and I couldn’t wait to see her again.

I’ve always wanted to sign up for befriending at one of the charities I help with events, Communicare and as soon as I came back home after Christmas that’s one of the first things I did.

After a DBS background check and filling in a couple of forms I met Kathy, a 91 year old lovely lady who absolutely loves having company, at lunchtime last week with Bryony, the volunteer co-ordinator. After our visit I messaged Bryony to let her know I thought Kathy and I were a great match and that was it.

I will now once a week (or more often if I have time) spend some time chatting with Kathy.

I was a bit nervous on my way there, it will be the first time we’ll be alone together…

‘Will she be happy to see me?’

‘What if we ran out of things to say?’

But after 5 minutes talking to her, nerves disappeared.

Kathy is remarkable. Intelligent, creative, funny and despite her dementia she can perfectly hold a conversation and oh my what wonderful conversations we had so far. I’ve learned so much from her already and we only hang out twice.

‘My dad used to say ‘always keep moving’, that’s the secret of still feeling young when you grow old’ Kathy told me after I complimented her for looking way younger than 91. That’s something I’ll always remember.

I left her flat, walking in the sunshine, with a big grin on my face, thinking about the incredible life she had and feeling blessed I met her.

That’s why I love what Communicare and other similar charities do. I volunteer some of my time which people always find impressive but I get so much more out of it than I give. Older people have wisdom, incredible stories and knowledge in abundance and I can’t believe that a lot end up alone with no one to speak to. It makes my heart hurt.

I’ll tell you her story after I ask her, if she agrees, because it truly is amazing, but my message for today is however busy your life may be, making time for others, especially others who might not have anyone to talk to it won’t only feel amazing, because you will be doing something for someone else, you will help pass on the knowledge and wisdom of the elderly to younger generations.

Eleni

Blogmas day 1- Christmas Tree of Light in Woolston

Happy First of December!

Christmas is officially here. Well, I’ve been watching Christmas films and looking for Christmas gifts for weeks but now we finally reached December, I can fully embrace Christmas.

I’ve been contemplating whether to do Blogmas this year. I did it for the first time last year and it was great but became exhausting towards the end. But since I loved writing every day in the buildup to Christmas, I’ll give it a go.

So here it is. Day one.

Saturday, 1st of December

I woke up early for a Saturday, but I finally felt rested, after a busy week. I had a coffee, replied to my messages, put the Christmas channel on and snuggled on the sofa.

I was tempted to stay at home watching Christmas films all day, since it’s been grim, and raining all morning, but one of the great charities I volunteer for, Communicare were to light their annual Tree of Light, for which you can sponsor a light in memory of loved ones and special causes and I offered to help out on the day.

So I got ready, I put my Christmas jumper on (first time this year!) and headed to Woolston for the very first time. A day of firsts…

I can’t believe I lived in Southampton for almost ten years and I’ve never been to Woolston before. I drove over the bridge, but I’ve never actually walked on it.

As soon as I arrived bubbles and snow (artificial as I found out a second later) were falling on me. I didn’t expect that. For a moment it just felt magical.

After about half an hour admiring the views and a brief wander at the Woolston Christmas festival, I made it to St Mark’s Institute. I covered our stand briefly and then headed outside for the Tree of Light switch on and to hand out some leaflets. The Local Choir Rising stars sang beautiful Christmas carols and then the Mayor of Southampton councillor Barnes-Andrews switched the lights on. What a lovely ceremony.

Everyone, grown ups and children singing along, enjoying the Christmas festivities, it was just wonderful. And I got to meet great humans once again. A district nurse working across Southampton, a lovely old lady running bereavement groups in Southampton and Fareham and a sweet, elder couple amongst others.

One of the highlights was seeing the lovely Bob I met at the Communicare Vintage and Craft fair who told me all about Woolston’s history, how the area has changed since Vosper Thornycroft, the war shipbuilding company closed down its shipyard at River Itchen. That’s why I love humans. I learn so much from others. Thank you Bob!

On my way back I stopped on the bridge to take a snap of the gorgeous water views. Breathtaking isn’t it?

A great start to December and Christmas. Now, time for another Christmas movie and some chocolate.

Eleni

Cakes, Christmas, Crafts and bears: Communicare Vintage and Craft Fair

Saturday, 3rd of November 2018.

My first Communicare Vintage and Craft fair as a volunteer.

I’ve been before with my SingNow friends a few times. I still vividly remember the scrumptious slice of carrot cake I had the first time I’ve been and that’s where I got the hand-knitted peach hat from my brother Andi loved so much, he kept after climbing Snowdon because it reminded him of me and brought back with him to Ben Nevis a year later.

If you haven’t heard of Communicare before, is a great charity offering befriending, shopping, DIY, transport and other services to those who need it in Southampton.

I always loved the bi-annual Communicare fairs and now I got to be part of it. I’ve been volunteering with Communicare as an events assistant for a while now but since I unfortunately work full-time I can’t attend many of their daytime events, I couldn’t wait for the Vintage and Craft fair, the first event I could help out with.

I was asked to design a flier for it months ago and thanks to Canva, an online platform with free templates- I highly recommend if you want professional-looking leaflets and posters, I came up with this one:

After months, the day finally came. And I had such a wonderful time, I went home tired but with a huge grin on my face that lasted for days (well until Monday morning, when reality kicked in and I had to go to work and spend hours staring at spreadsheets).

I made it on time, I know, some of you may be surprised but I always make it on time for things I really care (getting a taxi also helped!).

Collecting the prizes for the raffle gave me the opportunity to meet and have a chat with all the wonderful stallholders. There was a great variety from antique items, to Beach themed crafts, Christmas decorations, jewellery and paintings.

I spent some time giving out fliers outside with Vicky who was dressed as a bear, adorable, and I was so happy some of the people I gave fliers to, a lovely man with his three daughters who promised to pop by after the girls had their nails done and two couples, amongst others, decided to pop in and see what it was all about.

After a little wander and some purchases- it was hard to resist- I had a break for some delicious cake, again it was VERY hard to choose because of the endless options but I went for banana and chocolate. Yum!

I spent the rest of my time manning the stand for the impressive hand-knitted Nativity kindly donated by Bob ( I think, apologies if I mixed up the names) and selling our wonderful Communibears, of course I bought one too, they were too cute not to, and hand-knitted hats and scarfs.

I loved everything about it. The atmosphere, the live music, Jim Rogers (I can’t believe he sang one of my favourite Ryan Adams songs, Come Pick Me Up is a tune) and Serena Lin, who initially thought a CD was on, she was that good, were incredible, the stalls and all the lovely people I got to meet (and of course lovely people I already knew such as the wonderful Barbara, I love that lady so much, one of the nicest people I’ve ever met).

I’ll never forget Margaret, a retired teacher who went around to sell more teddy bears and ended up buying one for a little girl, she then bumped into one of her students from 30 odd years ago who told her she was the best teacher she ever had. After she took a picture of herself and her student’s family all together she asked her if she could record her saying that she was the best teacher she ever had. The joy in her face was indescribable.

Margaret was just one of the many wonderful humans I had the pure pleasure of meeting that day. There are too many to list and it’s impossible to remember all the names, but every single one made me feel welcome, something I always worry about as an expat living in the UK.

I wish I got to do this every day. Spend all my time making people smile. Maybe one day I’ll start my own charity to do just that. Who knows. Maybe…

In the meantime, I can’t wait for the next Communicare event. Thank you to the lovely Annie, Bryony and everyone else at Communicare for letting me be part of their wonderful charity and help a little little raising money for such a noble cause.

Eleni

PS Communicare is always looking for more volunteers, so if you fancy joining this beautiful community, or you’d like to donate or attend future events, all details are here.