interior design – Lessons I learned after I turned 30

Sunny lunch at Shanghai 1814

Two months ago, on a rainy afternoon, I was walking down the High Street with Shebz, I can’t remember how we ended up down there at lunchtime, but bright chandeliers in the then brand new Chinese restaurant where HSBC used to be caught my eye.

It looked stopped-talking stunning. Bright and luxurious, even more so in the cold, grey weather. I’ve been meaning to try it since but the period before Christmas was hectic and as it turned out January as well.

To celebrate the end of January and payday the lovely Sati suggested lunch with the rest of the work gang and I didn’t want to miss the chance of trying Shanghai 1814.

So a week ago I finally made it. I was in awe as soon as I walked in, the large black doors set the tone and the interior design took my breath away. After a while I forgot I was in Southampton. It’s a different world. Modern, spacious, bright, luxurious but at the same time simple and elegant.

High ceilings, stone walls, chandeliers, bright, black and red theme, tables and sofas and cosy private rooms and of course open kitchen, I love being able to watch what’s happening in the kitchen, I always find it fascinating.

I absolutely loved it. Shout out to the interior decorator. Amazing work.

The ever so serious Chinese maitre took us to our table. And it was time to order. Deciding what to have it’s never easy for me and it was even more difficult here because they had four different menus, their traditional menu, a dim sum one, a la carte and lunch. Oh my lord, where to start? I asked the maitre and even he didn’t know what to recommend. In the end we decided to stick to the lunchtime options as it was only £8,95 for a starter, main and a drink.

I had the vegetable spring rolls for starters and the beef in black bean and pepper sauce with fried noodles and I also tried some of Sati’s sweet and sour chicken and Suzanne’s glazed pork.

And of course, my favourite, Jasmine tea. Jasmine tea is probably the best drink to have when trying different dishes, I think even better than water. It beautifully clears the flavours from your mouth, leaving a subtle, clear, warm aftertaste instead so you can go on exploring new flavours without confusing your palate.

Everything tasted delicious (although I couldn’t enjoy my main as I had to run to a meeting and had to finish it in 10 minutes, it wasn’t easy!). I especially loved the smokiness of the noodles and the juiciness of the meats, the pork in particular.

Beef in black bean sauce and sweet and sour chicken

I want to go back and try more dishes. Next on the list are the dim sums. Whilst we were there we stared at what others have ordered and that’s when I saw a guy who I since refer to as ‘the legend’ having lunch on his own. He must had ordered half of the dim sum menu, the dishes kept coming for a while. He had some and took the rest at home. What a man. That’s what I want to do next time I’m there.

I loved everything about Shanghai 1814. From the decoration to the food to the service, even the never-smiling maitre. I just wanted to give him a cuddle and make him smile.

I can’t wait to visit again. Dim sums anyone?

Namaste

Eleni

**Disclaimer: I don’t get paid to do this, so this is a genuine review. And I’m no food expert, although I love good food ,that’s why I post about it so often, so this is my personal opinion.

Nostalgia…

It’s half past twelve, after midnight, Monday is here.

I can’t sleep. Typical. Listening to music, I let my thoughts travel far away, to Guatemala, to Shebz, back home, to my sisters and my family, to my brother Andi in London, to last week, to tomorrow, a brand new, busy, exciting week coming up…

Nostalgia

I’m feeling nostalgic. I love the world nostalgia, it comes from the Greek words nostos (νόστος)=return and algos (ἄλγος)=pain. Aching, aching to return. Aching to go back when I lived on my own. I miss my cosy, little studio I decorated myself. With the sun shining through during the day and watching the beautiful sunrise in the evening. It was small but perfectly formed. And I had the best landlord ever.

I’ve been thinking long and hard how to put my thoughts in writing without coming across as mean and horrible. Well, maybe I am. After all Eleanor Shellstrop of the Good Place is my inspiration right now. Legend.

The story so far…

It’s been a month today since I’ve moved into a shared flat.

I quickly got over the fact there is someone else listening to my music, hear me singing on my guitar, chatting with my friends, talking non-stop on Insta stories, my new obsession, or even smaller things that are surprisingly hard to get used to like going for a wee or number two or listen to my terrible singing when I have a shower. It wasn’t easy but I’m OK with it.

But I still can’t get used to it. I miss being on my own.

My flatmate has been really nice and friendly. Maybe too nice and friendly. He always offers to help, he even cooked for me, not the best cooking but I’m a harsh judge with all the chefs in the family and my love for food but he put music on and bought wine. What was that all about? Maybe a bit too much? Or am I just being Eleanor again?

Others would die for someone to offer help or cook for them but I don’t. I love my independence, doing things by myself. If I need help I’ll ask my friends.

When I come home after a long day I want to be on my own, unwind and do my yoga, write, read, draw, sing, play my guitar… The last thing I want is socialising. If I feel the need to talk to someone, I’ll chat to my friends and my family or I’ll ask a friend to come over or I’ll go out and meet my friends.

I make friends all the time. I’ll chat to everyone. Every human is special, even the not so nice ones. But home it’s a different story for me. Home is where I relax, I create, I have fun, I cry, I laugh, is my shelter, my comfort. It’s me time. And I find it hard to adjust.

It took me two years to reach where I am today and it’s vital, essential for my mental health and wellbeing to have my own space.

I kept thinking it would be different if it wasn’t just the two of us. Or if I lived with a girl. Or a friend.

I understand that my flatmate is going through his own battle. He is still getting used to the new situation himself. He used to live with a loved one, not a stranger, so he is probably still learning himself, like I do.

I totally respect that. I want him to be well and happy. And that’s why I kept all this to myself until now. It’s hard to have such a sensitive conversation without ending up hurting the other person, I wouldn’t like to do that. Although, I’m painfully aware he may well be reading this.

It’s nothing personal. That’s just how I feel. I miss my little home. And my way of dealing with all of this is to write about it. Writing is my therapy.

What have I learned so far?

My room is now my shelter, my castle, it’s bright and peaceful as a friend beautifully described it. The rest of the house is for sharing. So if I want to be on my own, my bedroom is my paradise. This is the only space is just mine.

I’m still unsure what the rules are when using the kitchen but I usually tend to cook when it’s free. I don’t want to be in his way.

I rarely use the living room anymore. I feel more comfortable eating in my room whilst I watch Friends or binge-watch a new series. Why make someone else watch what I want to watch?

The biggest lesson I’ve learnt is that having my own space is more important to me that I thought it’d be. But I’m doing all this for a reason. And I’ll stick to it for the next 5 months.

Now what?

It may get easier, it may not, although I’m hoping it will.

For now my room is my little comfort blanket, my hideaway, my creative hub and it’s enough, for now…

Namaste

Eleni

New beginnings-week 1: My first ever housemate.

I’ve never lived with complete strangers. I lived in student halls at Warwick Uni when I was 22 but that doesn’t really count. It was more of a communal, safe environment and I was not an ‘adult’ back then. I was still fearless and naive with ambitions and unrealistic dreams, like most youngsters fresh out of university.

I moved from living with my family, to student halls, to living with my ex-partner of seven years to living on my own for the last two years.

I may be biased because that’s my most recent experience, but I loved living on my own. Not from day one, but definitely over the last year. So moving in a shared flat was not because I wanted to, but purely for financial reasons.

I spent last week packing, a little bit every day and last Friday I moved out from my cute, cosy studio flat to a year old, bright, modern 2-bed flat, which came with a 32 year old guy.

This year the move was smooth and uneventful (last year was a nightmare, alarms going off, lost my car keys, bruised knees for months, it was a disaster!) since I learned from my mistakes and saved money for a removal company. I’ll post more on that and what else I discovered over the last 10 days later this week.

It’s only been a couple of days and there is a lot to get used to. I don’t live on my own anymore so I can’t play the guitar at silly o’clock or put music really loud and I don’t know what the ‘social rules’ are when sharing a flat. Should I offer my ever so polite flatmate a cup of tea every time I make tea and he is around? Are we to cook on different times? Are we to become friends or keep stricter boundaries? I don’t really know the answer to these questions and I’m not sure he does either but I guess it will all fall into place. I’ve been talking to my brother in London and he is going through a similar situation right now. I’m glad it’s not just me trying to figure this out.

I still wonder whether I made the right decision, should I waited until a gal was looking for a flatmate instead of living with a guy? Should I went for more viewings, should picked a different area? At the end of the day, I made a decision and I won’t know if it was the right one until later, so I’m trying not to torture my mind.

It will take a while to have a good night’s sleep and feel like home, I still feel I’m a guest here and I will soon go back to my old home but we humans are incredible when it comes to adjusting to change. I’m sure it will soon feel as I’ve been here for years.

I love what I’ve done with my new room in just three days and with minimum spending. It makes a difference when I walk into my room every day and admire how beautiful it looks. I could have spent more money on getting a new bed and furniture and so on but it will all worth it in six months time when I finally repay my loan.

Although today is apparently Blue Monday, the most depressing day of the year (which is a marketing campaign by Sky Holidays based on a nonsensical, pseudo-scientific equation they made up), I don’t feel sad or depressed. I did briefly on Saturday, my first day at the new place where I felt lost and overwhelmed with all the changes but today I’m excited and terrified in equal measure of all the things yet to come.

Great things coming up I can’t wait to share them with you.

So here’s to new beginnings!

Eleni