Blogmas bittersweet day 4

Day 4…

Blogmas is turning into a personal journal, it feels like a daily therapy session.

Today I was in a good mood in the morning, quite rare for a Monday.

Royal Mail delivered the little Christmas tree I ordered first thing in the morning just before I left for work, which cheered me up.

Andi, one of my favourite people at the Uni, the older brother I never had, was back at work today after his two week holiday, I really looked forward to seeing his little face peeking over his PC and in the afternoon the whole department would get to decorate the office with brand new decs and a REAL tree!

I’ve put together a Christmas playlist, we were to bring in festive snacks, biscuits, mince pies, cheese (I have to give it to Donna, she went all out!) and Sarah was bringing delicious mulled cider. I couldn’t wait! It was going to be a great Monday for a change.

As I mentioned before, my best friend Shebz is going away soon and today she handed in her notice. I knew about it months ago but today it got real. I’m extremely happy and proud of her, getting out there, travelling, exploring the world, like she always wanted to but I’m equally sad as I won’t see her every day, go on our adventures, chat about random things for hours, advise and comfort each other… When I get the time I’ll post a blog just about her!

What I didn’t know was that Andi is also leaving. I can’t describe how happy I am for him. He is an amazing, sweet, sensitive, intelligent man who deserves the best and he can finally now move on to a more rewarding, challenging job in London.  But I will dearly miss him. I wasn’t prepared for this although as soon as he said he had some news the first thing I said was ‘Are you leaving?’ I just knew.

I was in shock and went through waves of sadness and happiness all day. The Christmas decorations, music and food (especially the Cheese Christmas trees dipped in Camembert cheese) definitely lifted my mood and the office looks festive and lovely.

Now, after re-scheduling my PT session ( I couldn’t possibly exercise after all the cheese and mulled cider) I’m at home, desperately trying to put my thoughts and feelings in order.

After Christmas, two of my favourite people are leaving Southampton and I feel more stuck than ever. But that pushed me to make a decision, and it’s not easy for me to do, that’s why I’m still here.

I was thinking about it over the last few days but today I decided if I want to move forward, something’s gotta give. The most realistic way to save money fast so I can go into a more interesting job or try my lack elsewhere is to move to a shared flat or house. It’s a big deal for me, I love living on my own and it’s not going to be easy. I’m sure I’ll be OK though.

I contacted my landlord to hand in my notice as my contract expires in January. That only gives me a couple of weeks to find a new place before the Christmas break. But my landlord offered to let me stay on a month to month basis so I don’t have to rush!! Not many landlords would have done that, his kindness melted my little heart. Thank you James. I can now enjoy my Christmas holidays and come back and look for a new place.

Life is full of surprises and today was a great example.

It’s been a bizarre day… A bittersweet Monday…





Author: Eleni

HE support staff/Mental Health Advocate/ Blogger/ Foodie/ Amateur guitarist/ Love singing/ In love with my home island, Cyprus.

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