Category: life

The Austrian Ambassador (Dr Ziegler) and I

About a month ago a colleague forwarded a Facebook post to the group.

‘Ambassador in Cyprus for a day?’

As part of the International Women’s Day celebrations in Cyprus, women across the island could enter a competition and the prize was to spend a day with a female ambassador in Cyprus and learn more about their work.

All you had to do was send a short video (up to two minutes) with a brief introduction about yourself, why you’d like to be an ambassador for a day and why International Women’s Day is important.

Truth be told I didn’t know much about an ambassador’s life and I was really happy that there was no age limit to enter (I felt a bit frustrated lately with the amount of events or initiatives only for people under 30 years old) so I thought I’d send a video. I had nothing to lose and I love making little videos.

Unsurprisingly, two minutes were not enough to express all my thoughts but I tried. This was the video I sent.


I didn’t really expect to win. I’m older than probably most of the participants and ,well for those you’ve known me for a while, I’m infamous for my bad luck (don’t forget, during the first of what was supposed to be a few years of travelling and teaching English, I spent it in Italy, half of it locked inside due the global Covid pandemic).

Against all odds though I did win and I was matched with the Austrian ambassador in Cyprus, Dr Eva Maria Ziegler.

We had a little chat on the phone beforehand during which she explained that due to the current lockdown situation in Cyprus there weren’t many events planned this period so there was no point spending a whole day with her just in the office. I was pleasantly surprised with her honesty and openness from the get go, even over the phone.

So the plan was to meet her a few days later at the Austrian Embassy and have a chat. But she first invited me to the (virtual) Press Conference on Francophonie (the annual international celebration of the French language) and the celebrations planned by embassies across Cyprus as well as the Ministry of Education and Culture. I couldn’t believe I was part of a Press Conference which consisted of various ambassadors in Cyprus as well as the Minister of Education and Culture. What a surreal experience that was!

I knew about Francophonie as I happened to be in Brussels two years ago on that day, during which there was live music next to Manneken Pis, but I didn’t realise that was also celebrated in Cyprus with events planned and all.

A few days later I went to her office and we had a long chat. What an amazing experience it was to visit an embassy!

I can’t remember the last time I learned so much in such short space of time. I can’t possibly document all I’ve learned but I’ll share the highlights.

Dr Ziegler’s father was a diplomat, so she was familiar with that way of life since she was a child. Although she originally studied music management (and law) she found it hard to get into it and decided to follow in her father’s footsteps. She had an incredible career. She worked for the Austrian Federal Ministry of Foreign Affairs and she worked as an Austrian ambassador in Milan and in Lebanon amongst other countries.

We talked about politics, travel and she shared amazing stories from her ambassador life including the story of the extraordinary life of a 103 year old Jewish lady who ended up living in the Buffer Zone in Nicosia (and sadly recently died).

What she loved most of the ambassador life is the variety as embassy work is not just about visas and passports but also organising cultural events and initiatives as the embassy is given a cultural budget, as well as meeting a diversity of people from all walks of life. And of course an Ambassador gets to travel as every 4 years postings end and you get to apply for a different country. I would love to live the ambassador life!

The worst part of her job that she doesn’t enjoy as much is writing reports and long meetings. I don’t blame her!

After our chat I got to meet her PA, Mr Antonopoulos, A Greek-Austrian who’s been working as a PA in embassies for a few years. Similar to the ambassador, he loves the variety and travel that comes with the job. What he doesn’t enjoy is moving.

All in all it was a great experience, it’s not every day you get to meet an ambassador, let alone an honest, fun, easy to chat to one, as Dr Ziegler. I’ve learned a lot and it gave me a few ideas on what I’d like to do in the future.

Eleni

Why International Women’s Day is Important.

Why is International Women’s Day important?

For the same reasons Pride and Black Lives Matter are important. Because gender, racial and any other discrimination shouldn’t exist in the 21st century, your sexual orientation, gender and skin colour shouldn’t define your ability or right to do anything.

Because women still get paid less, are expected to marry and have a family and put that above anything else.

Because women are still considered ‘property’ of the man in some countries and are punished for getting raped.

Because old white men decide whether a woman should be ‘allowed’ to have an abortion.

Because although women fought hard to be given the right to vote, there are hardly any women who make it into politics (for obvious reasons).

Because a woman although considered ‘weak’ ironically has to try harder to prove that she can do the same job as a man. Doesn’t that make her stronger?

Because posting a photo of her in clothes she likes regardless of how ‘sexy’ they are considered or even sometimes posting a photo of her smiling somehow gives a man the right to harass her.

Because it takes years of hard work, self-love and self awareness for a woman to feel confident and strong enough to be who she is, with no fear. Because even today, employers would hire or promote a man, even though a female candidate with more qualifications and experience has also applied for the same position.

Because being sensitive and expressing your feelings is considered a weakness and ‘womanly’.

Because a woman for some reason has to justify her choices and if she acts like a ‘man’ is considered a slut, but if a man behaves the same way, ‘that’s just how he is’.

And the list goes on…

Living in a white male dominated world is tough, but women across the world will keep fighting for what’s theirs until racist, deeply embedded in the society patriarchy finally diminishes.

Here’s to all women across the world who never give up, here’s to those who suffer in silence because they are terrified, here’s to those who wake up every morning looking after their children, here’s to those who stay in bed because that’s what they want to do, here’s to all of us, regardless of our life choices.

It took me years to feel confident enough to be able to believe in myself. I was in a long term relationship in which I was told I wasn’t slim enough, educated enough, hell even good enough to write a blog. But I’ll never let any man or anyone else make me feel this way ever again, because I’ve always been a strong, confident, independent woman.

It just took me years to realise and I hope by posting this it will help women across the world realise it faster and not waste time, pain and tears.Here’s to women.

May we keep fighting and conquering the world, a little bit at a time, with a smile or tears in our face, it doesn’t and shouldn’t matter. #internationalwomensday

Eleni

Lockdown fever (why lockdown needs to end asap)

Two days ago…

I woke up early, earlier than my usual ‘get out of bed’ time and I was trying for a few minutes to remember what day it was. Lately, everything in my brain is messed up, turned into a huge tangled up ball of information, dates, worries, anxieties and at times throughout the day I get tiny panic attacks thinking about three million different things at once.

Will I finish everything on time?

Will I meet all my deadlines?

Will I be able to book a holiday soon? Will I be able to travel this year at all?

Is this how life going to be from now on?

Will we ever go back to normal?

What is normal?

Do I like living back in Cyprus? When will I adjust and how amidst the pandemic chaos?

I miss the UK a lot, should I move back in a few years?

What do I even want to do with my life?

This is just a small sample that goes through my head, all day, every day.

I can’t switch off, my eyes often hurt from the amount of time I spend in front of a screen, let it be phone, laptop or TV and I feel so tired I have no energy to do much after work.

I have very little free time for myself, and even when I do, I’m most of the time too emotionally and mentally drained to do anything else other than read a couple of pages of a book, watch an episode of a series, or the Cypriot version of Chase. I still do my Yoga and started running again, the park near my new flat is gorgeous, so at least I have that.

I rarely see my friends, we mostly chat online and I visit my family once a week. Other than my flatmate-sister I don’t have any other significant social interactions.

I haven’t travelled in months, I haven’t even travelled within my island for a while.

My emotions are all over the place and I get teary quite easily, well, easier than before.

I haven’t slept well for a while, I put on weight because I snack a lot, being home all day my only breaks are to snack and most of the time I spend the day in loungewear.

Social media and message notifications never stop, day and night, an inevitable side effect of the lockdown. It’s hard to keep up and sadly, I admit I can’t really keep up. I can’t possibly read and reply to everything or stay on top of news, videos, articles etc I’m sent or come across (after watching the Social Dilemma on Netflix, I’m even more aware how algorithms work, so I try not to feed the monster that often, but it’s proven rather difficult, considering it’s virtually impossible to survive without technology, the internet, social media.).

On top of that, I’ve only been back to Cyprus for a few months and I have spent most of that time under unique conditions, I haven’t had the chance to find my feet and adapt to my new life. The daily horrific news, the archaic legal system, sexism, racism and a number of other social issues I hadn’t realised beforehand, haven’t made it easy, I must admit.

Lest we forget the inability to plan in advance, organise a holiday, make plans for the future, is just devastating to even think about.

It’s like we are stuck in Groundhog Day over and over and over.

In any other circumstances, dealing with each problem or situation individually it would have been easy to cope with, but dealing with all of them, anxiety, social isolation, social media overload, exhaustion and the list goes on, is unbearable. I feel I’m drowning, I can’t see light at the end of the tunnel, it’s as if the sun is forever hiding behind huge grey clouds.

And this is not just me. The majority of my friends, colleagues and other people I talked to feel the same, and I’m guessing they are not the only ones.

I’m lucky I have a job and I live with my sister, but for others, the second lockdown effects are much much worse. They live on their own with no support network, a lot of people are sadly unemployed and it’s incredibly hard for them to find a job, even a temporary one now under these circumstances and let’s not forget all the businesses and freelancers who went bust or are dangerously near bankruptcy.

I fear the repercussions and impact of this second lockdown (the first one was a completely new experience to all, noone knew what to do what was happening, now life is supposed to continue, despite the lockdown) will be long and painful.

Do the benefits of lockdown outweigh the horrible effects on mental health? Is it worth damaging our mental health permanently? There are children who were born and only experienced life in lockdown, there are children who went to primary school for a month before spending the rest of their first ever school experience at home, there are teenagers who started university online, there are young adults who entered the world of work for the first time straight working from home. Suicide rates have gone up, psychologist appointments are high on demand and many fellow humans suffer in silence.

I personally think that we’ve all had enough of the lockdown. It’s time to get out, let the sun shine again, live like human beings, hug and kiss each other again and just be careful and responsible so there isn’t another outbreak.

Amen.

Eleni

PS To cheer us all up a few poems I wrote and some travel articles I posted on my other blog are coming super soon (well, maybe not so much the poems, they are rather melancholic).

My 2021 New Year wish (also food poisoning, Yoga and other events of my NY’s day)

There’s a Greek saying (which may originate from other countries) that loosely translates to

” Whatever you do on New Year’s Day, you’ll do all year around”.


I’m not superstitious at all but after the year the whole planet has endured and considering I spent the last few days of the year and New Year’s Day lying down weak and in pain , I certainly hope this one never comes true.

Last days of 2020…

A couple of days before the end of the year I got food poisoning. It only happened to me once before a few years ago but it wasn’t nearly as bad as this time. I threw up all night and the following day I just couldn’t move because even the tiniest movement made me nauseous.

On Day 2, New Year’s eve the nausea went but my stomach still hurt and I had almost no energy left in me, just enough to move from the bed to the sofa. It took me 10 mins to go for a pee and make it back to the sofa. During these difficult times, Oscar, the family’s guardian angel just laid on my feet, looking after me.

It was still a fun day, the whole family together (most of us struggling to stay awake after the tiresome couple of days each of us had) watching Christmas films, playing board games and having a laugh together. We made it to 12am and cut our vasilopita (New Year’s cake traditionally made in Greece and Cyprus, which contains a hidden lucky coin. Whoever finds it would be lucky all year, apparently.) but none of us found the lucky coin yet.

First day of 2021

On New Year’s Day I felt better and my stomach only hurt a little but I was still weak to move further than the living room. I just watched Yoga with Adriene’s first day of the 30 Day January Yoga Revolution, watched a few more films and had a little bit more food than the day before (dad turned on the foukou/Cypriot BBQ).

Yesterday I finally felt I could move and get out of the house, but after my morning walk with Oscar, I realised I wasn’t well enough to venture further than that.

I did however the Day One 48 min yoga session and it just felt amazing. Honestly, it’s humbling and moving to know that thousands of people across the world devote the time to themselves to do the session and at the same time I’m doing it, the chance is my friends as well as strangers are doing the same. I’ve written about Yoga with Adriene, a lot, if you want to find out more, you can do so here.

My 2021 New Year’s Wish

I decided a few years ago that making resolutions for the new year doesn’t and has never really worked for me. It only leads to unnecessary disappointment, plus I firmly believe you can make a new start at any time in the year. So since then I just make a wish for the New Year. (2019 Wish, 2020 Wish).

2020 has been challenging (to say the least) for the whole planet. Never have I ever in a millions years thought that the entire world would be locked inside for months, queuing at the supermarkets wearing masks, people dying off a global pandemic and all that during my first year of teaching English and living abroad.

After a pretty tough couple of months, teaching full time and a short break visiting my best friend in Barcelona, I had to (as well as thousands of other teachers across the world) learn how to teach online in three days and continued to teach online for months. For a first year, newly qualified teacher, it was a hell of a task, but I managed. I made a series of vlogs on how I dealt with the pandemic, I read, I drew, I even spoke to BBC World and BBC Solent about it. Being in Italy in March 2020 was just surreal.

After a heavenly few days exploring the South of Italy and two horrible days of travel amidst the pandemic I made it back home to Cyprus and enjoyed the summer, for a while, travelled across the island, started my Kopiaste vlog and blog until the nightmare of having to find a job and survive for now until the bloody virus goes away kicked in.

All that happened whilst I was and I am still trying to adapt to living in Cyprus for the foreseeable future, dearly missing life in the UK, travelling and trying new things.

I’m lucky though I have great friends and family who have always supported me either nearby or from a distance and I’m sure it will all work out in the end, it has to.

So my wish for 2021? Beside health, physical and mental, which for all of us has been a great challenge in 2020 in one way or another, I hope you feel and give love, do what you love and love what you do (being stuck in a horrible job is miserable enough as it is, let alone during a pandemic, but if you can’t quit for financial reasons, I hope you find ways to survive it, that’s what I did a few years back), I hope you don’t compromise and fight for what’s right and noble (that’s often the hardest road to take), let your creativity juices flow and above all enjoy life, enjoy the little things, that’s what life is after all, little moments.

PS I also hope we soon get to travel again. Life is just not the same without it.

Namaste

Eleni

December of 2020

December, normally a month full of baked goods, chocolates and treats at work, beautiful magical lights, Christmas markets, mulled wine, catching up with friends, streets buzzing with people shopping, having a laugh.

Not this December… The streets are empty, the cafes and restaurants are closed, there are no markets, no laughter, just some pretty lights and everyone in masks rushing to get home before curfew time.

I was going to name this post December at Corona times but it’s much more than that for me, it’s impossible for me to find a more appropriate name.

After three years I broke one of my traditions and didn’t do Blogmas. I just couldn’t find the time with my new job, looking for places to rent, getting used to living in Cyprus for now and still adapting to my new reality. Can you believe I haven’t sat down to play my guitar for weeks (minus a day I wanted to prepare something for my sister’s nameday)?

I guess adjusting takes time, even more so during a bloody pandemic and I just have to trust that all my irrational subconscious and conscious fears and worries will die off eventually.

On a happier note, after 12 years, I’m spending December in Cyprus which means, even during these bizarre and horrifying times we live in, that I decorated the Christmas tree with my sisters (we do it online every year) and we baked traditional Cypriot/Greek treats, kourampiedes (almond cookies covered in icing sugar) and my all time favourite melomakarona (honey syrup dipped cookies).

(Video and recipes coming soon on Kopiaste)

So I guess what life taught me once more it’s that it is never black and white, all good or all bad. It’s both all the time. And that of course it’s unpredictable. Who would have thought that I’d be back in Cyprus for the foreseeable future?

All I can do is enjoy whatever life brings me every day. I hope we all manage to have a homely, heart-warming Christmas with our loved ones, that’s what Christmas it’s all about after all.

Namaste

Eleni

I’m somebody else…

Saturday, 21st of November, 2020

Well, you look like yourself

But you’re somebody else

Only it ain’t on the surface

Well, you talk like yourself

No, I hear someone else though

Now you’re making me nervous

I’ve been listening to this in the morning and it hit me hard when I realised that’s pretty much the conversation happening in my head lately.

It’s been a while since I last sat down and scribbled my thoughts on (virtual) paper. Truth be told there’s been chaos in my head for the last year or so and making decisions doesn’t come easy for me, which made everything even worse (the global pandemic didn’t help either!) but now things are more settled, I can finally at least attempt to figure out what’s going on.

I loved my year in Italy despite its ups and downs and the incredibly hard work. I met amazing people, I made amazing friends and learned a lot (I’ll write about that soon, I think it’ll be helpful for newly qualified EFL teachers). But I realised I needed to try something different and I was also in desperate need for me time, which was minimal during my first year of teaching. Yeah, it’s as hard as you’d imagine and even worse if you teach for a well-respected, busy school.

I was planning to work part-time for a while and devote the rest of my time on all my hobbies and interests and then a job that seemed perfect for me came up. It combined my love of variety, my urge to help others and my never-ending wanderlust so I thought I’d apply although I didn’t think I’d get it.

If you live in Cyprus you are probably aware it’s almost impossible to land a decent job unless you know someone to recommend you but I wanted to make it on my own. Miraculously, I did. It was painful of course but it was worth it (I wrote about that too a few weeks ago).

So, what now?

I’m certain I made the right decision but I’m also still VERY confused, conflicted and not sure who I really am. I’ve written a little about it before, it’s like I’m two different people , living abroad for years does that to you and what’s worse I miss all my people, my nearest and dearest who know me well and thankfully keep reminding me every now and then who I am. I desperately need it now my confidence has taken a hit. It’s tough to be confident when you are that confused.

The truth is I feel more like an expat now I moved back to Cyprus, more than I ever felt 10 years in the UK.

I don’t know much for now, I have to find the right balance (I’ll start making more videos and posts on English and mental health and travel very soon, as soon as I enlist all my coping mechanisms!) but one thing I know for sure (thanks to my new manager who gave me such great advice during our interview I’ll never forget), moving back home comes with compromises, you’ll have to adapt to the culture again, but never lose your identity and who you really are.

And that’s my advice to you if you are in a similar situation.

I dedicate this post to all my friends who I haven’t seen for months or years (more than a year now). I miss you all and can’t wait to see you and hug you tight one day in the near future.

Namaste

Eleni

World Mental Health Day (the pandemic version)

This year I won’t write much about how important is World Mental Health Day. We all know that every day is Mental Health Day, we can’t look after our mental health once a year, we need to tend to it as much as we do our physical health, if not more and asking for help if needed is nothing to be ashamed of, it only shows you are human with feelings.

And if you are one of those people who goes around boasting you never had a mental health problem and telling others they should ‘man up’, then you are in deep denial. One person every 40 seconds commits suicide. Take a minute to let that sink in before you devalue others’ mental health struggles.

I won’t talk about my personal experience either, I’ve done it plenty of times, you can read more here, I just want to say, after everything the whole planet has been and still going through, especially these last few months, the constant fear of contracting the virus, worrying about our loved ones who are more vulnerable than others, the prolonged lockdown, struggling to cope with being inside for so long, the effects on our financial situation and worrying about employment and money, the psychological effects of self isolation, after all these and unfortunately much more, please just remember:

It’s OK. It’s OK to struggle, it’s OK to be angry, sad, frustrated, disappointed, worried.

We are all different and we all deal with our issues in our own way. Do what you need to do for yourself, look after yourself and remember to devote time on your mental wellbeing, in whatever form helps you, it could be anything. For me is yoga, writing, music and travelling, wandering around (though I can’t do much travelling right now but I try as much as I can on my little island). For others could be drawing, dancing, anything. Please don’t feel guilty if you haven’t been ‘productive’ or had a sofa day. 

And if you can, speak about it. Let’s get rid of the stigma once and for all. Why is it fine to talk about heart disease, cancer, little pains, big pains, express our worries, pain and fear when it comes to physical health but we still can’t openly talk about  it when we feel down or sad, or are diagnosed with depression, anxiety, schizophrenia, borderline personality?

So that’s my message for today. Look after yourself and talk about mental health.

Eleni

What do I want to be now I grew up?

‘What do you want to be when you grow up?’ everyone would ask when I was a child, a teenager, a young adult.

The answer differed as I grew up. A doctor, a singer, an actress, a teacher, a psychologist, a travel writer.

And when I grew up, I became none of these. I’m not even sure what I became.

A year ago I quit my office job, I left the UK, got a CELTA, taught English in Italy for a year and now I’m back home to Cyprus after 10 years and I have no clue what to do next. It’s exciting, in theory I can do anything but I’m mostly terrified and worried I’m too old, I’ll run out of money and end up nowhere.

We were brought up to believe that by the time we hit 30 we would have tried a few different jobs and settled on a career and be happy with that one dream job, or at least be happy enough to stay in a job indefinitely.

But a single career path is not for everyone and not always the case. A lot of successful people in pretty much every field changed careers when they were older and wiser or kept changing careers or juggled more than one jobs until they died.

What do I want to be now I grew up?

I’m one of those people. Not a successful one, not yet anyway but there’s so many paths I’d like to follow but it’s impossible to try them all and even harder to stick to one or two.

Some are technically, and by technically I mean financially, not possible. One of the occupations I always wanted to go into was counselling. But I can’t afford another qualification. I can’t even ask for a loan as I’m now back to Cyprus and all the excellent credit score I built up for years in the UK won’t help me much here. Do I even want to have a debt?

Should I continue with EFL teaching? I could but my first year though rewarding, was exhausting and had zero time for myself, my friends or to travel. And should I risk going to another country and end up locked inside teaching online because of this pandemic’s unpredictable course?

I could become a writer. The idea of writing a fantasy/crime novel always excited me or a raw honest non-fiction on how society, social status and let’s face it wealth (or perhaps lack of) can and has for generations embedded a deep fear of failure especially in women. It’s always tougher for a woman, let alone one with no savings or family money to have ambitions and not let disappointment take over.

I sadly not only realised that for myself (after years of deep self-exploration) but I see it in dear friends and family who are better in what they do than others who might have become famous or run their own business but they are too shy or lack the confidence to ask or go for more.

That’s why the majority of politicians, business owners, celebrities and so on come from wealthy or at least upper-middle class families with connections and financial support making it easier to succeed.

I should believe in myself more, but at the moment I am crippled by my own insecurities and fears.

So what do I know about myself when it comes to my next career step now that I’m on those crossroads?

I don’t want to be stuck in an office 9-5, I’d love to travel and most importantly I’d be over the moon if what I do for a living helps others in any way.

Unfortunately volunteering doesn’t pay and living with my parents after 10 years living on my own is tough. I need my own space to keep growing and figure out what to do next.

For now, I’ll keep pushing myself to do more, trust myself and try not to stress about money and work and in the meantime if you have any personal inspirational stories or any piece of advice, please do share!

Namaste

Eleni

Endings, beginnings and change.

This week’s video it’s all about endings, the end of my first year of teaching English as a foreign language, new beginnings, which at the moment I have no idea what those would be, and change.

I hope significant change. I hope the black lives matter movement keeps going on until we all finally realise our white privilege, our implicit racism as well as racism deeply embedded into every layer of our society, justice system, the world and our responsibility to change that. And the first step: educate ourselves, as sad and uncomfortable it might feel. Imagine if we feel uncomfortable reading and seeing this injustice, how much worse is for the people living it.

I’ve been watching a lot of documentaries lately, at the moment I’m watching Kalief Browder’s story, a poor kid who at age 16 was sent to adults prison. He spent three years at Rikers Island, two of those in solitary confinement for a crime not only he didn’t do, but was never convicted for. After his release he was so scarred from all the abuse he suffered, he committed suicide.

So here is this week’s video

Namaste

Eleni

5 minute mindfulness activity

Wow.

What a week. One of the most stressful of being a teacher. New classes with a small business group, formal observation, trying a dogme lesson, my birthday I couldn’t even celebrate because of work, a conversation club on Friday evening.

I also managed to book a flight back to Cyprus for July, but whether it will materialise it’s anyone’s guess.

To cope with all the stress I’m trying to focus a day at a time and try and enjoy the present as much as possible (sometimes it’s not that possible).

So I thought for my weekly post and video to put this little activity I wrote about a while ago into a little video.

The rest of the details is on the video. Skip to 3:04 for the activity if you wan’t to go straight in.

Eleni