southampton pride – Lessons I learned after I turned 30

Love and joy for all: Southampton Pride 2018

2018 has not been an easy ride so far but there are days I’ll never forget, days that made it to the top of the list, memories I’ll treasure for ever.

I travelled on my own for the first time to the beautiful Bordeaux, I made it to the top of the highest mountain in the UK, I moved to a home on my own again, The Solent Graduation week 2018, cherished memories with friends and family here and at my little home island and now Southampton Pride.

I loved it so much last year, I couldn’t possibly imagine how it can get better, but oh my it did.

A year and two cruise ship visits later, I got to know the volunteers and the organisers, the most loveliest bunch of humans I’ve ever met, especially Danny who has a heart of gold and I had no doubt Southampton Pride 2018 would be an incredible day but I didn’t realise how bigger and better it would have been.

A dedicated family area, playground, bouncy castles and cute farm animals. pigs, chicken, goats, I don’t know how much time I spent staring at the chicks and the ducks. There’s something soothing, heart-warming to watch the little, new to this world, innocent creatures just… being.

Food and drink stalls, a large bar, the Main Stage, and inside the Guildhall there was a second stage and countless stands, selling merchandise, charity representatives, a glitter stand, the Great Wall with messages of love and many more I didn’t get the time to explore.

Whilst walking around with my friend Jamie who volunteered for the Pride last minute, taking snaps of our wonderful guests, I caught a glimpse of my adopted brother Andi on the Teacup rides with his goddaughter, so sweet it almost brought me to tears.

This year there was a doggie area, one of my favourite parts of the Pride, where you could get your dog trained, and there were feeding and water bowls. I lost count of how many cute dogs I got to pet. A paradise on earth.

I spent half of my shift with Jamie, capturing all the joy and fun of the amazing, loving humans attending the event, giving out cards with details of the survey we set up to know what people thought of the event, that’s how we’ll learn and keep making it better year after year (if you were there and want to fill it in all details here) bumping into people I know, Solent colleagues, friends I haven’t seen in a while, the gorgeous Carlos and Jens and my brother Andi, who every time I see it’s a painful reminder of how much I miss seeing him every day.

At 2pm, it was time for the Parade. I missed it last year, so I didn’t know what to expect. What an amazing atmosphere! Men, women, transgender, singles, couples, families, children, dogs, all together in bright, happy colours, walking in the centre of Southampton celebrating love.

When Jamie left, I teamed up with the lovely Rebekah and went around again to take more pictures, I’ve seen the man with the Blue Eyes and the beautiful smile I saw last year and asked for a picture again, that was a special moment, we loved watching Cheeky Girls and Union J and just before my shift ended we were asked to clean the toilets. Not the most fun thing to do, but someone has to do it, and we had a laugh doing it.

After my shift, I joined Darren, Donna, my UK mum and my brother Andi, my little Solent family for a well deserved drink. What a beautiful end to an already incredible day.

This is why I love volunteering. To be part of something so great, to make others smile. to be able to help in any way it’s a feeling nothing compares to.

Thank you to all the organisers, sponsors, Cunard in particular our main sponsor, it wouldn’t have been possible without them, and volunteers, paramedics, security guards, everyone who put together a spectacular, marvellous event for the city, especially Danny who asked me to do something I really enjoyed last year and because of him I had the opportunity to get on top of the Bargate the day before.

I hope more businesses support this great celebration to grow from year to year and remain free for all to enjoy.

If you want to be a part of something truly special, we are always looking for more volunteers. I can’t wait for next year!

PS. Thank you to whoever made the scrumptious chocolate cookies for the volunteers. They were so delicious I had five!

Eleni

On board Queen Victoria

Friday, 20th of July,

8:03. The alarm goes off.

I can’t get up. I can’t move my feet. I really want to make it to the QEII terminal. I really want to make it to Queen Victoria but I’m really not sure I can.

You know that feeling, after a huge stressful event in your life, an exam, an interview, a dentist’s appointment (for some of us), when the adrenaline dramatically goes down and emotional and physical exhaustion takes its place? When there is still some stress residue at the back of your brain, but you feel drained and tired all the time?

My anxiety reached record highs in the last couple of weeks, it reached levels I couldn’t keep under control. I physically felt sick, sick to my stomach.

The drama of finding a place to move into tested every inch of me (blog coming soon). As soon as I moved in I relaxed. But couldn’t shake this blanket of sadness. That was to be expected. Closing the door on the last 6 months was not easy.

Last night I had to say goodbye to our beloved boss Dave (more on that soon). I know we’ll keep in touch but there is a real possibility I may never see him again. I may not be in Southampton or in this country when he comes back from Bangladesh, he may decide to stay there permanently… I may never see him again. What a terrifying thought.

‘Why didn’t he say hi??’ Whilst I was sitting at Tapas, waiting for Dave and the rest of the gang, I saw someone I knew passing by. They pretended they didn’t see me and I did the same. I don’t handle rejection well. I instantly felt sad. Sometimes I feel too much… I walked to the bar to get a drink, had a laugh with Angel, the barman (that’s what I call him after he made me a delicious Angel’s Touch) and then I looked around the table, the beautiful company I was in, my wonderful friends and colleagues and smiled. Maybe one person rejected you, but look how many others love you and cherish your friendship.

But I really want to make it to the ship visit. All the lovely people I met last time will be there, Danny, Liam, Jordan, Richard, Cat, Tansy and when will I ever be offered the chance again to get a free tour and three course meal on one of Cunard’s most luxurious ships?

I drag myself out of bed, had a quick shower and got ready. No casual clothes as per the dress code so I put on my blue floral dress and black heel sandals and make my way to the terminal.

The sun is shining and the harbour is buzzing with passengers getting out of the ship, naval staff getting on board, taxis, cars. I love it.

A million thoughts cross my mind on my way there. I’ve been struggling with confidence again lately and the sadness is overwhelming sometimes. I wonder whether anyone will remember me from last time, if they still like me, if they ever liked me?

I make it on time for a change! Everyone is there, having a cup of coffee. I grab one and I start chatting with two lovely ladies who work for the Mayflower.

And then I meet Christina. A Solent Cruise Management graduate who landed her dream job at Carnival. Another great Solent success story. I wonder if our ER people know about her... We chat about living abroad, her job, her dreams, her aspirations. She is gonna be one of our tour guides and she is a bit nervous. I’m somehow certain she’ll do great.

The tour is about to begin. Christina and her manager (why can’t I remember her name?) who looks very familiar were brilliant. Where do I know her from? Who does she remind me? Is it from my time at Carnival?

The main hall looks amazing, with the grand piano catching my eye immediately and where later it’ll be full of beautiful music by three exquisite violinists which I genuinely thought it was a recording. I could imagine myself in a vintage lace dress walking down the stairs, sitting across the violinists enjoying a glass of wine…

We then pop to the library, it has a very traditional, Harry Potter, almost magical feeling to it.

I vaguely remember the rest of the tour, especially towards the end, when hunger was getting real but some of my favourite parts I do remember and snapped:

One of the suites that was larger than my whole flat. As part of the package you get your own personal butler and champagne amongst other perks.

One of the standard rooms, very claustrophobic.

The gorgeous, elegant restaurant areas…

My favourite part of the ship: The Spa. Especially the hot stone chairs, I could stay on those for ever.

My second favourite part: The viewpoint on the upper deck. The views are breathtaking. Every night in my dreams
I see you, I feel you
That is how I know you, go on

The theatre. Bright red and gold colours. Stunning.

The vintage dance/performance/ball room. Here I am again, in my vintage lace dress, jiving…

And as with every ship, the beautiful sea views. What is it that draws me to the sea? Is it because I was born on an island?

By the end of the tour we were all starving.

We met at the Britannia restaurant for our three course meal and unlimited wine.

I went for the Crayfish and Crab cocktail with avocado sauce for a starter, the roasted (to perfection) medium rare beef accompanied by glazed vegetables and finished off with white chocolate profiteroles served with pistachio and coffee ice cream.

All three courses were delicious, the wine and service were impeccable (the waiter refilled our wine glasses every time we were running low) and I had just the best company on my table. Tansy, Liam, Jordan, Gavin and… Leslie! That’s who she reminds me of, Leslie Knope!! She sounds like her, she even looks like her. Here she is at the background. Pat, Sarah? Doesn’t she look like her??

At some point during lunch, the lovely Danny, one of the main organisers of the Pride came over to chat about my responsibilities for the day. I’m incredibly grateful he trusted me with something so important and I hope I won’t disappoint him.

For those who don’t know Danny, he is not only kind and sweet, he also does most of the planning for the Pride alongside his main job. He goes home after work and spends hours organising THE whole thing. I truly admire him.

It’s now less than a month before the biggest, most colourful, cheering, love celebratory, open to everyone, party takes place in Southampton, the Southampton Pride 2018 (25th of August). And I can’t wait.

If anyone would like to volunteer, I’d with no second thought recommend it. You meet amazing people, who make you feel loved from the very first moment you meet them, it’s a fun day you’ll never forget and who knows, you may be on the next free meal Cunard offers for volunteers.

A huge, enormous thank you to Southampton Pride, Danny, the rest of the organisers and Cunard for supporting such a great initiative and of course for the free ship visits and delicious meals.

I wouldn’t probably afford to go on a cruise on either Ventura or Queen Elizabeth and even if I could, I’d opt for a month exploring Cuba and Costa Rica so for me to be given the opportunity to get a glimpse of how these gorgeous sea crafts operate and what they offer to their passengers as well as eating on board with such a wonderful bunch, it truly is a blessing.

Namaste

Eleni

On board PnO’s Ventura

I’m on a ship, having lunch, wine and a laugh with Liam, Jordan, Richard, Tansy, David and Cat.

How blessed am I? How did this even happen?

Last August I saw a post on Facebook urgently asking for last minute volunteers for Southampton Pride. Some of my favourite humans and officially the best hugger was going to be there, my dear Jaba, Mr Dixon, my brother Andi and others I didn’t expect. So I emailed the lovely Danny and I ended up having one of my best days of 2017.

Fast forward to last December, Cunard, one of the Pride’s sponsors offered free lunch for all volunteers on one of their beautiful ships but due to bad weather it was postponed.

A couple of weeks ago Danny messaged. The free lunch was to take place on Saturday, 21st of April. Who could say no to free lunch, on board one of PnO’s largest and newest cruiseships with lovely people?

I almost didn’t go. I had a crazy busy week and hadn’t slept enough in days. I was exhausted. But I knew I’d regret it if I missed it. Sometimes I just know. I have a gut feeling. I wish I listened to it more often.

But I got up around 9am, way too early for me on a Saturday, got ready and made it to Ocean Terminal on time.

I didn’t know anyone else there, although that didn’t phase me, I love people. But I didn’t know what to expect.

I surely didn’t expect a three course meal in a posh restaurant, with our own table waiter refilling our wine glasses. The food was lovely and the wine, delicious. I’ve recently became a big red wine aficionado and the red that came with our meal was divine.

The meal started with asparagus and devilled egg mayonnaise followed by baked rump of lamb and ended with dark chocolate mousse cake with praline surprise and coffee.

dark chocolate mousse cake with praline surprise

I also did not expect to meet so many incredible, fun, amazing humans. Richard’s laugh and all the smiley faces sum up the day beautifully.

After our scrumptious meal and a tiny bit giggly because of the wine, lovely Tom gave us a tour of the ship. We’ve walked through the main restaurants, the spa (my favourite part), the deck, the shops and our last stop was the art gallery.

Thank you to Danny, Tom, Cunard, PnO, everyone who put together this lovely day for us. I can’t wait for the next one.

And I can’t wait to volunteer for the next Southampton Pride in August. More volunteers are always needed, so if you fancy spending an awesome day helping out to run a beautiful, colourful, fun event, full of laughter and love, head on their website. This year it will be bigger than ever!

Namaste

Eleni

Last day of summer.

I can’t believe is the last day of August already.

This summer went fast but felt painfully slow at times.

I went home for 10 days, I climbed Snowdonia for a local charity, Solent Graduation, theatre nights, 31 Yoga Revolution, Southampton Pride, and Summer in the Square were some of the highlights (check my homepage for much more).

journey-circle-music-movement-ritual-inspiration-22

But it’s been rough at times.

Most people enjoy routine. I get bored. Every couple of days I change my route from and to work. I try to do something differently every day so one day doesn’t feel exactly the same as the last one. I’d do much more if I could afford it.

And is no secret I’m in desperate need of career change. I love Solent, I love my colleagues but what I do day to day is brain numbing. My mind craves for more.

But it’s not that easy to move on. I cannot just leave. At the end of the day it all comes down to money. Yes, money doesn’t bring happiness. But is the means to an end.

I cannot just quit and get experience in a brand new career path without taking a hit financially, a hit I can’t afford right now. And I don’t know exactly what I want to do next.

I love Social Media, creativity, I love writing, I love interacting with people, talking to people, helping in the community, I love being out and about and not behind a desk all day. But I have no ‘professional’ experience in any of these.

I do these at my free time or through volunteering for events through work. I make zero profit from any. I only do them because I enjoy it.

I’m no professional singer, or guitar player, restaurant reviewer, book reviewer or social media manager (I spent an unhealthy amount of time on Instagram checking out places, interior decoration and food, lots of food). And I’m no professional blogger. That’s why I haven’t blogged since Monday. I only blog when I feel inspired or want to share something. And any shops, brands or services I happen to mention it’s because I genuinely like them.

Anyway that’s my situation. But I started to think that maybe…

Everything is as it should be.

Because it motivates me, it pushes me to make changes. And at the same time not rush into things just for the sake of it.

Because being in this position right now got me into Yoga that is now part of my daily routine and never fails to give my brain a break. It led me to learn more on Digital Marketing, I had one of the most motivating conversations on LinkedIn (thank you for the Irish Luck sent over!), inspiring conversations at the park with strangers, it pushed me to be more open and try things, it made me a better person.

And I have high hopes for September.

After my week in Italy and Friendsfest (I cannot wait!!!!) I’ll try my best to make more changes.

For now, I take every day as it comes. It is quite rare that a whole day will be bad. There are always small beautiful moments even on a crappy day.

And today is payday!!!

I already ordered my absolute favourite perfume, Roses de Chloe, that reminds me of hot summers in Cyprus when I used to spray grandma Stella’s face with rose water (I was looking for this perfume for a while and only found it early this year), I’ve done all my holiday essentials shopping, getting a new book and got my Jaba hug 🙂

Today was a good day.

And everything is as it should be. For now.

Namaste

Eleni

A weekend of love,singing and sunshine (courtesy of Southampton Pride and Summer in the Square)

Happy Bank Holiday Monday!

What a wonderfully amazing weekend it has been. I don’t even know where to start from.

A couple of days ago a notification came up on my FB feed that they were looking for volunteers for Southampton Pride on Saturday and I seized the opportunity to help and be a part of this beautiful celebration of love, no matter your sexuality.

To begin with I was asked to assist with fundraising but I wasn’t very good at it. I felt uncomfortable interrupting people whilst having fun asking them to donate. So after a while I went back to the boss and asked if I could help with something else. I was by the gates for a while and after I was relieved I ended up with the most marvelous job.

I was paired up with this lovely lady and we were given a gorgeous feather embellished frame and a camera, and we were asked to go out and take pictures.

I absolutely loved it! Every minute of it. The smile on peoples’ faces made my little heart melt every single time.

It’s such a cliche but is true. Beauty is who you are not how you look. Beauty comes from within. It really does. And all I could see with every photo I took was gorgeous, beautiful humans. Every time I said gorgeous, beautiful, lovely, I really meant it.

I cannot wait to see the photos when they are published. I’d love to share some of my favourites with you.

And the fun didn’t end there.

One of the highlights was the best hug I’ve had for a while, by this gorgeous man in the Guildhall giving away free hugs.

I loved the comments board. So many wonderful messages!

I’ve bumped into lovely friends, I made new friends and the evening came to an end watching 911 with my brother from another mother.

I’m so happy and blessed to have been a part of this beautiful celebration of pride and love. Love is love. Nothing else matters. It doesn’t make a difference whether you are straight, bi or gay. It doesn’t matter what kind of love it is. Family, friendship, romantic, platonic.

I was in a 7 year relationship and never really felt loved. But the love I felt from my family, friends, colleagues and on some occasions even strangers, over the last couple of years it more than made up for it.

Love is love!

On Sunday, another glorious sunny day, I got to sing with Singforce for Summer in the Square and also got to watch my old pals from Sing Now Choir and Love Soul.

At that moment, singing with colleagues in the sunshine whilst my Sing Now friends cheered us on, staring at the clear blue sky, I felt so happy!

I had a lovely afternoon enjoying a scrummy smoothie in the sun at Mettricks with my Sing Now friends afterwards.

To my Sing Now friends who asked me whether I’m coming back.

I want to say that I really do miss you. I met the most wonderful, genuinely nice, friendly people through Sing Now. And when I saw most of you yesterday, not for a second did it feel awkward. It felt like catching up with family after you haven’t seen them for a while.

If I end up staying in Southampton, depending on what I do next, I will definitely return. I miss you all.

When I came home yesterday I cried. It was happy tears. Happy and grateful for the beautiful weekend I had with lots of singing, pride, sunshine and love.

Love is love

Eleni

Sun, Frappe and Cake Friday

Happy Friday!

Last weekend of August and only 12 days until I meet my best friends and soulmates, my sisters in Italy. I cannot even put in words how much I look forward to it.

And today couldn’t get any better. Sunny and warm. The best start to the weekend!

I felt a bit homesick in the morning, daydreaming of sunny breakfast next to the sea, but had a great time enjoying frappe (it wasn’t the same but close enough) with friends in the sunshine at lunchtime, treated to Lemon Drizzle Cake (thank you Sati!), new music on Spotify (love New Music Friday)-I heavily dislike the new Taylor Swift song, love JP Cooper’s Wait– and I’m having a relaxing pizza and Friends Friday evening.

I love pizza Fridays, one of the few traditions I kept for years.

https://www.instagram.com/p/BYNa9jFh-X6/?taken-by=eleni_zenonos

I won’t blog for the next couple of days as I will be volunteering for Southampton Pride tomorrow and singing with SingForce for Summer in the Square on Sunday. Come and say hello if you are around Guildhall. I’d love to catch up or meet you if we haven’t met yet 🙂

I will post all about it on Monday!

Happy Bank Holiday!

Namaste

Eleni